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Mens Bible Study . . . Me?

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11 replies to this topic

#1
The White Coyote

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As most of you know, my Barbershop faces directly into the parking lot of a very large Baptist church. The church also has a day care, a k thru 8 school and several programs for teens, young adults etc. etc. It is a very busy place and the pastors are both good customers of mine. We always have great discusions and part friends regardless of our opposing beliefs.

Today however, one of the members came into my shop for a haircut and began the conversation by asking me if I would like to come to their "Mens Bible Study" group. I kindly said no thanks and went about my job. He then pressed the issue and asked why not? I simply answered that it wasn't my cup of tea. Again he pressed me and I jokingly said "I stopped believing in unicorns and fairies a long time ago." Well that got his dander up and he asked what I meant. I tried 3 times further to end the discussion but the guy was relentless, so I told him if he could answer three questions truthfully with documented facts to back up his answers I would go to his Bible study.

1. Who are the definitive authors of the Bible?
2. How was light and day and night created on earth before the sun existed?
3. Where did Adam and Eves sons get their wives?

His answers were;

1. Matthew wrote Matthew, Luke wrote Luke, John wrote John etc. etc.
2. God was the light that was created before the sun. (WTF?)
3. God created them for Cain and Able.

It was all I could do to keep from busting out with laughter but I managed to act serious and told him, "Okay now just show me the reference works where you got this information and I will show up at your Bible study."

He was so excited as he drove away.

So my question is, should I change my oil this weekend or do you think I should wait another week? :snork_lach:

#2
Ungodly

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I have the sense that I have only read the first chapter of this story.  Your patron may be back with proof in the form of:

1) It must be true, it is in the Bible
2) The Bible is literally true, word for word, in every detail
3) The Bible is the unerring Word of God because the Bible says it is

#3
lady

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Posted Image

:Tounge:

#4
Ungodly

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[quote author=Storybook link=topic=474.msg3310#msg3310 date=1171135622]
If God can do anything, why didn

#5
Unbeliever

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I have the sense that I have only read the first chapter of this story.  Your patron may be back with proof in the form of:

1) It must be true, it is in the Bible
2) The Bible is literally true, word for word, in every detail
3) The Bible is the unerring Word of God because the Bible says it is


Yeah or "Here, take this 9 millimeter to that boy!"

#6
Unbeliever

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When we die, we are not a physical body anymore.


I don't know, some people claim to have seen ghosts, which are supposedly supernatural entities, but ghosts must be made of something that can reflect photons in order to be seen, or they must emit photons, so they must be natural.

I think I'll bring that up at Yahoo!Answers and see what kind of silliness I can generate.

#7
Frozenwolf150

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So did he ever show up again?

I would have quizzed him on bible trivia, just to make him squirm.  For example, according to the bible, what was King Solomon's annual income?

*snicker, snicker*

#8
The White Coyote

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I imagine the next time I see him again will be when he needs another haircut nd he will have "forgotten" my questions. Just as well. I'd rather have his $$$ than his bullshit. :snork_lach:

#9
TopHat

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The old cut and run, a very usable tactic.

#10
Ungodly

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The old cut and run, a very usable tactic.

And after the running away is over, the tale of victory begins.

#11
Unbeliever

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So did he ever show up again?

I would have quizzed him on bible trivia, just to make him squirm.  For example, according to the bible, what was King Solomon's annual income?

*snicker, snicker*


Yeah, or even Solomon's real name!

#12
Unbeliever

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And why is it that all of these wimpy, candy-assed supreme deities that can't take a little bit of verbal abuse always seem to have such a big temper problem too?


Because god has a hissy fit: "You better believe in me our you
can't come to my heaven!".  What a jealous and needy god.
Why does God NEED humans to "believe" in him as a ticket
to heaven?  Why does he NEED their belief? 
God threatens humans with the fires of hell but people
would need a nervous system and a physical body for fire to hurt us! 
When we die, we are not a physical body anymore.  The fires of hell are
a threat invented by man to cause fear and control the masses.

The whole idea is absurd!


Yeah, absurd is just the word for it!


According to John 12:47, Jesus didn't much care if everyone believed him:

And if any man hear my words, and believe not, I judge him not: for I came not to judge the world, but to save the world.




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