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Debunking Bullshit Apologetics - Quick Response Version

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#1
Frozenwolf150

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This is something that's been on my mind lately.  A couple of years ago I started looking into various arguments theists commonly make in order to prove the existence of God, or to discredit established science, and how these arguments can best be debunked.  Granted that any fuckhead who claims they can prove that God exists is automatically a bigot who has their head up their ass, none of these arguments are based on any evidence or observation, and all of them had already been shot to shit a long time ago.

However, there are still a large number of fundies, including some scholars, professors, and theologians, who not only believe this kind of crap, but also go around trying to lend credibility to these arguments by sticking their names on it.  Chances are that on any given skeptic, anti-religious, or atheist site, you're going to have idiots showing up touting these arguments, as well as dropping names like William Lane Craig, Michael Behe, etc.  This got me thinking.  Are there ways to rip these arguments out by the roots without wasting time in long, drawn-out debates with retarded fundies?  Assholes like these have no shortage of material stored up in order to back up what they say, and debates with them can potentially go on for days and days.

I'm essentially trying to come up with the fastest, most efficient counters to these arguments as possible, to avoid wasting time humoring these brain-dead fuckups.  What are the shortest, quickest responses you can think of to classic arguments for God?  Here are a few good ones I've heard:

Argument from Design - This encompasses the teleological, cosmological, and first cause / prime mover arguments, as well as any and all variations of them.  We've all heard it before.

Response: OK, let's pretend that life / the world / the universe was designed.  So what?  Your God STILL doesn't exist!

Argument from Morality - Basically, this is the argument that morals have to come from God, blah, blah, blah, etc.

Response: If you need an I.B.S.D. telling you that it's wrong to rape, murder, steal, and pillage, there is something horribly wrong with you.
Response 2: There are literally hundreds of passages in the bible indicating that the biblegod is a sick, sadistic monster.  If you're getting your morals from him, there is something horribly wrong with you.

Evolution is a Lie! - This category includes any bullshit claims that theists come up with thinking they can prove evolution wrong.

Response: OK, let's assume for the sake of argument that evolutionary theory is 100% false.  So what's your point?

Pascal's Wager - This is that asinine "believe in God OR ELSE" argument.

Response: A threat is not an argument.

Argument from Popularity - Any argument that points to the Christian majority, or asks, "How can 2 billion Christians be wrong?"

Response: When Catholics, Protestants, Orthodox Christians, and all the other thousands of sects start seeing eye-to-eye, let me know.


Post whatever other quick responses you can come up with. :rebel_cool:

#2
Ungodly

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Argument from Popularity - Did a majority of people once believe that the Earth was flat?  Did this cause the Earth to be flat? Belief without evidence is unwise.

Pascal's Wager - a bet is proof of nothing, playing the odds does not change them, your Imaginary Bearded Sky Daddy still does not exist.

Evolution is a Lie - even if our current knowledge of evolution is partially or largely flawed, this still does not indicate the existence of an Imaginary Bearded Sky Daddy, nothing else does either.

#3
The White Coyote

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The Missouri argument: Show me.

#4
Ungodly

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The Missouri argument: Show me.


Maybe Gawd is invisible as an evolutionary adaptation to protect against predators, like reality.

Reality trumps Gawd 100 times out of 100.

I'd hide by being invisible too if I was merely an artificial construct of ignorant and bossy people seeking any means they can find to justify their violence. But hey, that's just me.

#5
The White Coyote

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"Show Me"  Is actually a very good argument. All I am asking for is visual proof of Gods existence. That seems like such a small thing to ask. Of course they always counter with "Just look at everything around you." which you can counter with, okay let's say God created everything but that's his handiwork, I want to see the handiman. Where is he?

#6
Ungodly

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Yes, I agree that Show Me is a very appropriate question to ask when presented with a fairy tale.

#7
Unbeliever

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When I look at everything round me, I see the workings of nature in a universe that doesn't give a damn about my comfort or well being, a universe that would just as soon torture me with excruciating pain as to pamper me with riches and women. In short, the universe looks to me exactly as it would if no God exists.

#8
FlatEarth1024

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Argument from Bovine Fecality:  What a bunch of bullshit!  I'm so sick of 'sunsets and puppy dogs'.  Give me something...anything...just one single shred of verifiable evidence and I'll be more than willing to explore it with you.  But if the best you can do is, "Well, I just...I just...FEEL it!" then we have nothing more to discuss.

#9
The White Coyote

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I'm so sick of 'sunsets and puppy dogs'.


Awww now you don't mean that . .


Posted Image

#10
The White Coyote

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Adorable Puppys is what I do!

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#11
Storybook

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Adorable Puppys is what I do!

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Oh God!!  You are killing me!  I love pictures of puppies.  I went to the pet store here in town, just so I could see puppies and maybe hold one if they would let me and they didn't have any. :Sad:  Where do you get your puppy pictures?

#12
The White Coyote

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I steal them!

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#13
Unbeliever

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I'm so sick of 'sunsets and puppy dogs'.


Awww now you don't mean that . .


Posted Image


Hmm...is that a boy or a girl puppy?


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